I lie in the dust, preserve my life according to your word. Psalm 119:35.The message version says it like this: I’m feeling terrible- I couldn’t feel worse! Get me on my feet again. You promised, remember? Regardless of the version you read, it’s obvious that the Psalmist was not in a good emotional state. He felt as if his life was in the dust. He felt terrible, down and most likely depressed. Many historians believe that David suffered from bouts of depression and when you read the Psalms, it is easy to see his desperation. But David made a habit of turning to God in his time of need and God always lifted him up and restored him.
You may have never experienced a true clinical depression, I haven’t either, but most likely you have had seasons in your life that you felt sad and depressed. Times that you felt hopeless and surrounded by darkness. I have been there more than once. For me, it usually occurs after I have made choices that were not in line with God’s will. Most recently it happened when my child decided to walk down the wrong path. I think that that it can happen for many reasons. Maybe it’s the loss of a job, the death of a loved one, a divorce or many other unfortunate things that occur in life. No one looks forward to these seasons. They are uncomfortable and painful. If you are like me you would avoid them at almost all cost. However, I’m not sure that these times are always bad for us. I’m not so sure that we could be our best self without these unwanted seasons where we feel dormant and buried.
For instance, look at the tulip. It is one of the most loved of all flowers. How can you not feel the hope of spring when the colorful tulips start to break the earth and fill the ground with color. That beautiful site doesn’t happen instantaneously. The bulbs (that are several years old) are planted in the fall and need cool fertilized soil for about six months before they bloom. The tulip requires time in the soil before it blooms for our enjoyment.
We will not enjoy the dark season, but maybe, just maybe God is allowing us to be buried so that we can rest in him. Maybe he uses these buried seasons to cultivate us and shape us for the next phase in our life. If during that buried phase, we allow God to water and feed us, we will grow into a beautiful unique creation. I have not enjoyed the dark season that I have been in, but looking back I can see the good things that have come out of it. I learned to trust Him while I was buried. He changed my heart while I was been buried in the dirt. He changed it in ways that could never have occurred if I were standing in the light. Was it painful? Yes! But I know, just as David did that he will put me on my feet again! He promised (Psalm 119:35). I also know that God will use my time of cultivation for His glory if I allow Him to.
If you feel like you are buried today, take heart, you are just planted!
Sometimes when you’re in a dark place you think you’ve been buried but actually you’ve been planted. Christine Caine